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What if My Family Doesn’t Want Me to Get Sober?


Family eating dinner

Alcoholism is a precarious disease which doesn’t like solitude.  Due to its hereditary attributes, it’s likely you’re not the only one in your family suffering from the disease, which can make it significantly harder when you’re ready to get sober.  Unfortunately, a fact of life is not everyone is willing to live a life of honest sobriety, which is why over 80,000 people die each year in the United States from excessive drinking.  The CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) states alcohol is the third leading cause of death, nationally.  These statistics are alarming, yet alcoholism can maintain such a strong hold on a person’s life, they’re unwilling to give up the liquid poison.

Many alcoholics have siblings, cousins, or even parents that exacerbate their disease.  The phrase “misery loves company” must have been created solely to describe alcoholics because they tend to migrate towards each other.  Birds of a feather flock together because it creates justification for their behavior.  When you spend all your time with someone who drinks an equal amount, if not more than you, you don’t feel badly about yourself.  In fact, people in addiction tend to seek others who are worse off because it makes them feel better about themselves.  

When one person of the group wants to break away and seek help for their disease, it completely breaks the dysfunctional dynamic everyone once operated on.  A person who isn’t ready to seek help for themselves will see their loved one as developing an attack on them.  They will also try every angle and extent of talking you out of becoming sober.  It’s important for you to remember that you’re doing this as a benefit for yourself, to save you from the gutter crawling disease of alcoholism.  They may be angry, but you getting sober could potentially save their life, also.

While the one left behind may hold resentment for sometime and not want to see or talk to you, it’s because their disease is angry.  Deep down, your loved one wants what’s best for you, regardless of what that looks like.  Yet, their disease makes them behave in a manner which says otherwise.  They may feel betrayed at first, but moving forward with your decision and focusing on yourself is the best choice you can make.

The answer to recovery is Simple. Our multi-tiered program is designed to help your loved one find success on a new path in life through school, work, and meaningful volunteering. Structured for progress, clients at Simple Recovery transition seamlessly through each phase of their recovery. Call us today for information: 888-743-0490